I want to do interesting things. I want to meet interesting people. I want to be interesting. I’m not, you know… I’m pretty boring company. At least, I bore myself… and I’m not very social these days… and I have nothing interesting to talk about.
I used to think I wanted to be in a band. There’s a part of me that still does want to be in a band. There’s a part of me that wants to be a writer, there’s a part that wants to be a mother (no, not yet, don’t panic,) and there’s a part of me that wants to be invited to interesting events because I have a site that people are actually interested in going to.
But I’m really boring. The more time I spend with friends, the more I realize it… any time I see cyn, I can’t think of anything to talk about. I would get together with monica more often, but I feel completely out of her league… like I just don’t have anything to talk about that is at all interesting.
Work is the same as always… boring. There’s no change in my life status. There are no dramas happening in my life. In fact, nothing at all has changed recently. If I talk about myself, it’s just to bitch about the fact that I haven’t been able to write a creative word in months. I’m sick of hearing that from me, everyone else should be too. I don’t even have to bitch about worrying about money at this particular moment in time… which is something completely new and different and probably won’t last.
Meeting people from Marigold, I’m always the one people don’t remember that well because I was quiet or shy or something. Oh, and I’m usually standing next to Cyn, the most memorable person I know. Always lots of comments about how great Cyn is (she is), how cool her hair is (it is). She is great. It’s true. She’s one of the best people I know, and I’m really happy to have her as a friend. She’s also really interesting.
I hate being bored with myself. I hate being bored at all. And I really hate being boring. I’ll avoid meeting people because I have nothing to say. I didn’t even do anything interesting on my vacation to talk about… I sat at home and played on my computer, or I went shopping. I’d love to say Oh, we went to new york, or denver, or anywhere more interesting than Ikea…