Untitled

I want to do interesting things. I want to meet interesting people. I want to be interesting. I’m not, you know… I’m pretty boring company. At least, I bore myself… and I’m not very social these days… and I have nothing interesting to talk about.

I used to think I wanted to be in a band. There’s a part of me that still does want to be in a band. There’s a part of me that wants to be a writer, there’s a part that wants to be a mother (no, not yet, don’t panic,) and there’s a part of me that wants to be invited to interesting events because I have a site that people are actually interested in going to.

But I’m really boring. The more time I spend with friends, the more I realize it… any time I see cyn, I can’t think of anything to talk about. I would get together with monica more often, but I feel completely out of her league… like I just don’t have anything to talk about that is at all interesting.

Work is the same as always… boring. There’s no change in my life status. There are no dramas happening in my life. In fact, nothing at all has changed recently. If I talk about myself, it’s just to bitch about the fact that I haven’t been able to write a creative word in months. I’m sick of hearing that from me, everyone else should be too. I don’t even have to bitch about worrying about money at this particular moment in time… which is something completely new and different and probably won’t last.

Meeting people from Marigold, I’m always the one people don’t remember that well because I was quiet or shy or something. Oh, and I’m usually standing next to Cyn, the most memorable person I know. Always lots of comments about how great Cyn is (she is), how cool her hair is (it is). She is great. It’s true. She’s one of the best people I know, and I’m really happy to have her as a friend. She’s also really interesting.

I hate being bored with myself. I hate being bored at all. And I really hate being boring. I’ll avoid meeting people because I have nothing to say. I didn’t even do anything interesting on my vacation to talk about… I sat at home and played on my computer, or I went shopping. I’d love to say Oh, we went to new york, or denver, or anywhere more interesting than Ikea…

7 Comments

  • strange

    October 2, 2000 at 8:16 pm

    Completely out of your league?

    I think sometimes you forget how much I envy you (in a non-destructive way of course.) You have wonderful boy and stable relationship. You fit in a lot better than I ever do, you may not realize it but I feel so uncomfortable in social situations with groups that unless I am performing or promoting the press I avoid them entirely. I have fewer close friends than I can count on one hand. I guess maybe I hide these things well but that’s all.

  • highlearn

    October 2, 2000 at 8:56 pm

    Eh.. not so

    First off {{{{{{{{{{{JennyLee}}}}}}}}}}}

    You are quite an interesting person! Don’t try to measure yourself by the standards you measure others. Cyn is great as Cyn. You’re not Cyn! you’re JennyLee! The most wise often speak the least- contributing their knowledge at the crucial moments.
    and d00d. You have red hair. your haid 0wnz. 🙂

    HL

  • mtbandit

    October 2, 2000 at 10:29 pm

    As much fun as it was meeting Peter and chatting about the Good Old Days of rec.music.flaky-redhead with him, I was just as eager to meet you, and I’m so very sorry I didn’t get much chance to talk to just you. That Pete can carry on, can’t he? Anyway, I feel like I am one of the less interesting people that most people know, so I know whence you come. But no really, we’re fascinating in our own little ways.

    • triggerhappy

      October 3, 2000 at 1:27 am

      wow. it’s weird how people perceptions of themselves are…….really not what i expect i guess. i find you SO cool. and interesting and definatly NOT boring. same with Cyn and Boo and Bria and Monica and just about everyone but me. you’ve all gone out and done THINGS with yourselves or tried or still trying. you’ve all lived life. and yet…….each one of you have said things that i go “wow. that’s how i feel/felt”
      anyway, i guess i’m just saying i don’t think your boring at all. and your vacation sounded pretty cool to me. 🙂
      ((((hugs))))

  • mithoviel

    October 3, 2000 at 1:45 am

    I know the feeling. Why else would I make transcontintal ventures to play games? It’s not that my friends here aren’t great, but they don’t share the same interests.

    I haven’t had the opportunity to play guitar with anyone in a loooooong time…it was a lot of fun. Also, though I don’t share my writing with anyone, I’m comfortable with letting you look at it and criticize…
    Thus, I must find you to be interesting. Too bad the whole crew doesn’t live closer.

  • magicwoman

    October 3, 2000 at 7:26 am

    Boring? or just plain interesting?

    Gee the grass always seems greener in someone elses life – just ask me? I’ve been there and found out I don’t like mowing someone else’s lawn. Oh well. You are interesting or else I wouldn’t have added you to my friend’s list. I think it is interesting that Midnight Bandit said the same thing – I thought he was interesting enough to add to my friend’s list too. I tend to gravitate to Libra born people (the other sign being my own – Leo). The web is a big world – the LiveJournal just brings us all closer together. Don’t worry – you are interesting . . .

  • cyn

    October 3, 2000 at 5:17 pm

    not sure what to say…

    i don’t think you’re boring AT ALL!!!

    just sometimes quiet – which is fine!
    doing things breeds energy and courage. it’s the fear that holds us back. when you get used to kicking fear’s ass, life gets a lot easier.