It’s cold in here today… not quite cold enough to turn the heat on yet. I can’t believe it’s nearly mid-november and we haven’t turned the heat on once… how odd. I guess our hydro bill will be pretty low. That’s not such a bad thing.

Maybe I should wait a week or two to carry out my nefarious plan… (okay… so it’s not much of a plan, and it certainly isn’t nefarious, but still…) Anyhow… maybe I should just wait until Jay’s settled in and happy with his new job before I do anything. I’m trying to be all responsible and grown-up here. No, I don’t want to stay, but I have a lot of trouble just leaving… what if Jay’s job thing doesn’t work out, what if he hates it, what if they fired him… then we’d both be without work. Too many what-if’s, I know. I hate them, but they haunt me.

Maybe I’m just afraid. Nothing is ever certain, is it?



  • duncan

    November 12, 2000 at 9:55 am

    Trip to Vancouver

    Just think, if you quit you can take your second weeks vacation and not have to go back to Toronto after only one week, you could stay two or three maybe……well two anyhow. Wouldn’t that be fun?

    • Jenny Lee Silver

      November 12, 2000 at 10:27 am

      Re: Trip to Vancouver

      OOOooooooooh… that would rock.

  • Anonymous

    November 12, 2000 at 11:25 am

    I agree, you should wait and make sure everything with jay pans out…but you sound like you really need to do something different…is it possible to take a leave of absence from work…tell them your burnt out or you have to go home to vancouver because of personal reasons and you don’t know how long you’ll have to stay…and then if and when you feel its right quit

    • Jenny Lee Silver

      November 12, 2000 at 4:39 pm

      They don’t do ‘leave of absences’ there… I know another employee who asked for one so he would be able to take a bit of time off to travel, and they shot him down without even considering it. I’d thought about that option, but it doesn’t seem like the kind of place that is keen on doing that sort of thing.

  • highlearn

    November 12, 2000 at 12:11 pm

    Feeding upon itself
    From where, to where?
    making something from nothing
    conjuring terror