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It looks very cold outside. I’m shivering in sympathy with the trees. Cam is on. Adam told me that his meeting on monday went really well, which rocks. We talked a little bit about ambition, and how it’s a difficult game to play… I told him I wouldn’t know, since I have no ambition to speak of, and he argued that point with me. I guess it’s safe for me to admit that my ambition is NOT to stay at home and clean up and cook and stuff like that. All that does is make me angry most of the time. So I’m apparently great at figuring out what I don’t want to do. That isn’t all that helpful. I envy the people I know who are driven, who do something because they love it, who know what they want, or at least have a list of things that they want to try… I’d like to not feel lost.

2 Comments

  • ben

    February 15, 2001 at 10:52 am

    the who is the what before the how

    Sounds to me like you haven’t thought enough about who you yourself *are*. Define your identity. It is not given to you through birth or divine intervention. What makes you uniquely human, and distinctly *you*, is that fact that you get to invent yourself. Once you know who you are, or more importantly who you want to *be*, you will know what to do to get there and become *that*.

  • ex_oki86

    February 15, 2001 at 11:55 am

    At least knowing what you don’t want to do is better than knowing what you may want to do but not having the courage enough to try and pursue it.

    So it actually does help… in a wide world of things to do… it narrows your perspective down some.