Just spent the past few hours practicing guitar and learning new songs for the next FneuCast. Adam and I were both painfully bored tonight… He eventually went to play Megaman and I followed him to play some guitar. We managed to not be so bored once we did that.
I really need to find another source of income. We’re okay this month. We’re doing pretty good, considering. But I don’t know about next month, I don’t know how my hours are going to look with this being part time, if they stay the same as they are now or get any less then we’ll have problems… Oh well. Worry about it when I get there.
I had this mood last night where I felt useless and incompetent simply because I’m nowhere near as frantically busy as some of the people around me, and lots of the people I see online. Ended up having this big conversation with Adam about it… It occurs to me that I don’t like being painfully, frantically busy, so busy that I can’t enjoy my life, can’t just up and go to a coffee shop because I feel like it, can’t go see fireworks when they’re playing because I’ve got too much to do… It just isn’t something I ever want to do. It probably makes me lazy according to Torontonian standards, but that isn’t what matters to me. I’d rather be lazy and happy than accomplished and out of my mind with stress. It’s just not my thing.
And that’s just it. I’m happy… honestly happy. I don’t really need anything else. I may well want things… but there’s nothing right now that I actually need.