Dayle is an asshole dickwad bastard of an idiot beast.

Last night as Adam and I sat at our respective computers we heard an incredibly loud, destructive, clattering crash. We looked up at each other and simultaneously said “Dayle,” while hopping out of our chairs to see what was going on. (I do mean hopping, it’s kind of like an obstacle course getting around the chairs and bed to the door of our room.) The sound seemed to have come from the general vicinity of the bathroom, so we headed across the hall and switched on the bathroom light… to be greeted by a scene of rampant and terrifying destruction.

Dayle slinked out the door, narrowly avoiding a boot to the head (*thwoomp*.)

On the floor were many shards of my mother’s pinwheel crystal vase, a stream of water, four bamboo shoots, and a whole lot of pretty blue glass decorative beads. I looked up at the ledge from whence the vase had come, and saw the destruction of the toilet, which had been in the unfortunate path of the falling vase. The toilet lid was cracked centrally out from the side, and not in an easy to repair kind of way. Oh no, not when Dayle is involved.

I swear if I had got near him within one minute of finding the destruction he had caused, I would have been hard-pressed not to throttle the beast. He seemed to know that and hid from us for a very long time.

Today I went out shopping with mom to find her a new pinwheel vase and a new toilet lid. Just when we had a tiny bit of extra cash, we forget to incorporate the Dayle Destruction Factor. Bastard cat.

8 Comments

  • metalxmonkey

    November 21, 2004 at 5:30 pm

    (found your lj through the vancouver comm)

    My dog is similarily destructive. This morning he ate cash out of my purse…the cash was not at the top of the purse. The damn dog had to root through my purse, bypassing many other tasty things in there (candy bar, lollipop, lipstick etc.) to get to the cash. It was the last $15 I had.

    I hate my mother’s dog. It has NO obedience training whatsoever and she rewards him for chewing on thing he isn’t supposed to by saying “I’ll trade you – drop that for a cookie” *rolls eyes*

    • metalxmonkey

      November 21, 2004 at 5:32 pm

      PS when I say “ate” i mean devoured. The ten-dollar bill is no where to be found and there is less than half the 5 left.

      • Jenny Lee Silver

        November 21, 2004 at 5:36 pm

        Hello there. I’ve just recently moved to Vancouver.

        Dayle’s never managed to eat money on me, fortunately. He does hunt brocolli from time to time, however

  • jenny

    November 21, 2004 at 5:31 pm

    boot to the head (*thwoomp*.)

    Hee!!

    Oh man oh man, how quickly I forget how destructive cats can be!

    • Jenny Lee Silver

      November 21, 2004 at 5:34 pm

      Dayle is a new level of destruction, I think… And I’ve owned a lot of cats in my life.

  • artyste

    November 21, 2004 at 5:55 pm

    Reason #3802702802823850827082780728076 (add appropriate commas) why I’ll never, ever, EVER own another cat again.. ever.

    • oki_v2

      November 21, 2004 at 9:27 pm

      I don’t think I’d ever get any pets like cats or dogs, unless they stay outside. Heh.

  • luxography

    November 21, 2004 at 10:02 pm

    Holy cow (or cats)… when you said “toilet lid”, I automatically thought “toilet seat lid”, which isn’t as expensive to replace. 🙁