A few notes on the usage of crutches

1 – When using crutches things that are not normally obstacles become so. For example, you need a far wider path through hallways, door ways, and rooms with coffee tables and couches, than is generally normal.

2 – Items on the floor that one can normally step around when not using crutches become deadly. A bike glove that has fallen onto a hardwood floor acts much like a banana peel under the foot of a crutch.

3 – Your speed is greatly reduced. You must learn to deal with this.

4 – Stairs are a bitch. Small ledges onto the sidewalk are a bitch. Stepping into a car is a bitch. Getting on the bus is a bitch. Basically, leaving your seat to go anywhere is a bitch.

5 – You can no longer carry anything. This includes hot beverages, laundry, dinner, and cats. Attempting to carry a cat will lead to excruciating pain followed by curling up on the floor whimpering. Ow.

6 – People let you on and off elevators first, but may or may not be kind enough to open a door for you.

7 – Biking is right out.

3 Comments

  • testytree

    June 10, 2005 at 1:10 am

    Do you have that lovely rash in your pits yet?

    • Jenny Lee Silver

      June 10, 2005 at 1:11 am

      not yet… but soon i’m sure.

      • testytree

        June 10, 2005 at 1:29 am

        That will quickly move to #1 on your list.