I got up a bit early this morning and drove my brother to the ski hill on top of Mount Seymour so he could practice for the ski competition he’s entered. It was lovely, driving up and up and up along the switchbacks until we emerged from the fog and gloom into sunlight above. It reminded me of going to work on Grouse, taking the tram up above where the clouds ended.
I’ve been moody today. I’m basically moping about the computer thing thoug, which I’ll have to get over soon before I drive myself nuts. I’ve also been worried about Adam the past few days, although he seems to have levelled out fairly well. Perhaps I am now more disappointed than he was.
It’s a challenge, knowing how we’re supposed to move forward from here. There are things that I want to do with my life, and while I know that there is time, I don’t really know that for sure. Not for some things, at any rate. I’ve always been a little bit anxious for what’s next, for what’s coming.
Since about 4:00 this afternoon I’ve felt like wrapping myself up in my down duvet and lying alone in the dark of my room. Instead I made dinner with Tara and Adam and Craig, and we went for coffee and were social and all of those things. I’m starting to feel the push of really needing some time to myself. I had hoped that this Sunday while Adam was at work I would be able to do that, but I’ve promised mom I would go out to her place and help her out with some stuff. As such, that is what I will do. I was going to tell Adam to come out to Pitt Meadows and we could do dinner there, but now I’m thinking maybe I won’t. Maybe instead I will stay for dinner then take myself somewhere to just sit and think. I can find somewhere if I try. I just need some time to think.