I decided at some point that this year I must make myself more awesome.
Now, I know I’m already pretty awesome, so why mess with something that works, right? Well let’s face it: awesomeness takes work. I’ve reached a balance point that I’m pretty comfortable with when it comes to feeling confident and like I have a good idea of what I’m doing. This is a nice place for me to be, and it’s become sort of easy to just be the awesome version of me.
The more I stay in this safe, balanced area that I’ve drawn for myself, the more stagnant I start to feel. It’s like if I don’t continue coming up with new and exciting ways to be awesome, then I start to bore myself. Once I start down that path, I worry that I’m not living up to my (awesome?) reputation with other people.
Whether or not this is true is irrelevant. I want to continue feeling like I’m awesome, which means I have to keep moving my version of awesome every once in a while to something out of reach, yet something attainable, and something I can work towards. I’m not really happy at one level for too long – I want to be better.
And so, my quest for increased awesomeness. I’m just working out what that looks like. I think in part it means allowing myself a bit more opportunity to try things (and risk failing at them.) But there’s more to it, and more for me to think about.